Sunday, July 28, 2013

Return To Sender.

If I can do anything well, it is definitely laughing at my own missteps.  This morning I committed the ultimate misstep and am on my way to joining the ranks of Anthony Weiner and Geraldo...but not quite the level of Kim Kardashian and Ray J.  

In an effort to send one thing to Jambo and something else to Petunia, I got a bit mixed up.  I actually don't even know what happened so I cannot make a lame excuse...I cannot even blame it on the 7 mimosas I had with brunch....I just was not paying attention.  Long story short, I sexted Petunia...and not just a racy statement...it included a picture.  It's true.  Obviously, this is my karma for attempting to sext Jambo while he's singing in church.

I realized my mistake within moments of hitting send.  I tried to be stealthy and delete the message before the send status meter filled up completely in hopes that it would not be delivered, but I was not so lucky.  The message went through.  Delivered.

Of course my first option was to crawl into a hole and DIE.  I thought maybe I should just not say anything, perhaps Petunia wasn't by her phone and wouldn't notice...ever.  Or perhaps I could quickly send her a bunch of memes and someecards and push the message in question far enough back that she couldn't find it.  Or I could just join the witness protection program, change my name, move away, and never speak to her again.  The latter of the three seemed the most reasonable.

Finally, I just swallowed my pride and apologized for sharing my assets with the wrong recipient.  Petunia, being the incredible sport that she is, laughed the entire situation off...I'm sure she was laughing at the situation and not the picture....

On the bright side, it could have been much much worse.  The message could have ended up with one of my other recent contacts which include my current boss, my former boss, and my aunt.  Clearly I need to brush up my sexting skills before making an attempt like this again in the future, and frankly, I sure feel like a weenie.

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